The Lost Mind

The Lost Mind

 

I did not welcome you into my home,

You were not invited into the precious dome

That contains the most critical component

Of who I am; don’t think for a moment

That you will rule my mind.

You began your assault from the side

And crept in, destroying the happiness

I possessed, you stole the brightness

That I so dearly treasured in my memories,,

The things that were accessories

For who I was as a person.

Your mission was to worsen

My self-identity and self-worth, my personality.

You destroyed it all and left me with the mentality

And physicality of the dead beneath my feet.

Bipolar, if you were a person, I would beat

You into a literal lump of pulp

And consume your painful existence with a gulp

So no one has to suffer anymore

And so you can be nevermore.

 

 

 

 

 

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The Sixth Trumpet

The Sixth Trumpet

 

The fair creature stood on the rock,

Gazing down upon the chaotic land,

Waiting to start the end.

 

Its fair hair blows in the air,

Soaking in the pain and terror,

Waiting to unleash utter hell.

 

It raises its bow and draws,

The blood tipped arrow prepared

To draw the blood of the innocent and corrupt.

 

The string is taunt and screaming

To be released and to bring death

And let rivers run the streets.

 

The fair creature releases the arrow

And it sails to its prey,

Blowing the sixth trumpet of apocalypse.

Human Angel

If we could stop and look around,

What would you see in front of you?

You would see people,

Different than you,

But human nonetheless.

Some are afraid of home,

Coming to freedom with nothing

Other than what they wear,

Yet people fear the worst

From those most desperate,

For aid, clothes, food,

Things we take for granted.

They are human,

Like you and I.

Help the helpless,

Aid a human like you,

Fear not their helplessness,

Provide a helping hand,

Be an angel to a human in need.

Border Crossing

Sometimes people don’t make it when they attempt to cross the border illegally. The heat alone is enough to kill.

 

Home is lost.

The land of free,

Help me find solace,

Help me secure my family,

We need a new home.

The desert burns,

Throats itch, skin prickles.

Help protect my family

With a new home.

 

Dreams of the Beautiful Suicidal Souls pt. 3

Another story to continue the thread that I have started.This story does not depict myself or any person I know, nor is it meant to depict any person, living or deceased. Hope everyone enjoy this work.

 

June 10, 20XX

 

Today is the day I die. I shouldn’t be thinking like this, but I am. I have planned on how to kill myself for weeks already. I don’t want to live in this world anymore.

Just for being different I was hurt. If I dated a girl, I was called a dyke. If I dated a guy, I was labeled a whore who couldn’t keep her legs closed.

All I did was end one relationship and began another. I stopped loving her and began to fall for him. I didn’t cheat on her nor did I do that to him. But kids will be kids and label and judge. All because I identify as bisexual.

They threw fake money at me, telling me that I should be used to this. Saying that a whore like me should take it as a compliment that people want me even though I’m “diseased.” I will say this with confidence that this “whore” is actually a virgin.

Ridiculed and laughed at, rejected by the people around me and those that called me their friends, I feel empty.

All for simply being different. I had thought that my school was about inclusivity and diversity.

I want those who tormented me to know that my blood will be on their hands. I want them to forever remember my name, to always remember the pain they inflicted upon me. I want them to always remember that the girl they killed was simply another human. I want them to realize that I had dreams too. I wanted to help find a cure, or at least a better way to treat, for cancer. I wanted to help my little brother heal after having gone into remission.

I had dreams, just like those that will keep on living. Just know that you caused me this pain. It grew so much that I couldn’t bare it anymore.

I want anyone who reads this to know that words do hurt. It can and will destroy a person’s mind and thoughts and hopes and dreams. It did so for me…

I want anyone who reads this to know that words can hurt. I want you to realize the words you are saying. You need to understand the pain people will go through. You need to see that people do take things to heart. You need to realize that words can be just as deadly as knives.

I’m off to drink now. Bye. I love you, my dear family.

 

Forever Eternal,

Mya Huxley

Dreams of the Beautiful Suicidal Souls pt. 2

Another piece I thought about for this little story line and thread. This is not me or anyone I know. This is not based on anyone but rather inspired by what has occurred in current issues. Hope everyone who reads this enjoys and let me know if anyone would like to see more material like this.

 

July 25, 20XX

 

To all of that read this,

 

Depending on who reads this letter depends on the message I have for you.

If it is the police who first read this letter, I beg for you to spare the sight of my body from my family. I do not want them to see what will become of me…

If it is my family, then I am truly sorry. I couldn’t stand the torture anymore. I was beat in school and mentally attacked. To suffer daily and to have the onslaught continue even after school has ended, it became too much. At graduation, you saw that people would not talk to me, they avoided taking photos with me, pushed me away. All for simply being gay…

I am a gay man. I’ve been called a faggot. I’ve been called queer. I’ve been called a bitch. I’ve been pushed down on a guy by tormentors and smacked and called so many names. I would get disgusting drawings in my locker. I’ve been the recipient of hotdogs being thrown at my face, told that I should like that. I’ve been tied up on a fence and left to bleed.

All of this for simply being different.

I was outed after I told one of my friends. She told another person and that caused a domino effect and eventually many people from school found out and then you, my family found out. I’m so happy and proud of you guys for having accepted me. But it was not enough help in the long run.

If you are one of my tormentors, I sincerely hope that you are not seeing this message. But if you do I hope you let this phrase sink in: “Do onto others as you would have them do onto you.” I hope that you are willing to be hurt and tortured as how you did to me. I hope your “harmless games” were worth it. I wish that you no longer laugh, no longer find the joy of the world. You stole my joy, my hope, and I hope you lose that too.

Today is my birthday. I turned 18 today. We already did my little party. We ate at this nice steak house. I had hoped to travel the world, go to college. Find a husband.

Today I turned 18. Today I die. Today, I was told to “fuck off” and to go “suck a big one” on my birthday.

Today I turned 18. Today I lost all hope.

I love you Mom and Dad and little ones.

 

Love Always,

JJ Smith

Election Day

CONGRATULATIONS AMERICA!

As a collective body who voted in the primaries and chose the nominee indirectly, those who were allowed to vote have quite possibly ruined America, and I congratulate you. I thank you for giving me, an 18 year old Latino-American male, some of the worst choices for president. This is my first time voting, my first ever election, and I am simply appalled. And for that, I also congratulate you.

Now, I know that not everyone supported the criminals who lead the two major parties. That is understood because I myself supported Governor John Kasich and Senator Bernie Sanders, each of the opposing parties. However, enough people supported the clowns, and well, here we are. Today is Election Day. The day where America will be ruined for 4 years. Whoever the president is in 2020 will have to do plenty of repairing. I sincerely hope whoever wins will lose as an incumbent.

Let us look at the facts. Both are criminals. One has not paid federal taxes in nearly 20 years. The other has handed out classified information like candy in electronic messages. One has blood running all over them, has caused so much loss of life. The other has been a racist towards many communities and has been charged with being sexually aggressive and derogatory to an entire sex. One will ruin the job market in America, the other has refused to pay workers. Both of their economic plans will ruin the United States economy, sending us deeper into debt.

I mean, they have good qualities. I would assume. They have picturesque records. With dirt and blood covering most of that record. Is it possible that they know what they are doing? Possibly but also possibly not.

This post is not meant to sway anybody, everyone has their opinions. Sadly, the voices of many went unheard or were overshadowed by the screams of the few clowns. But there is nothing to do now. It is simply a matter of voting or having voted, and waiting for the results later in the evening.

For those who say that voting third-party is a wasted vote; a third-party vote is not a wasted vote. I am voting my conscience and voicing my opinion as to who can lead this country best. However, the two-party makes it virtually impossible for third-parties to have major support. Things must be changed and soon. This ridiculousness will continue to hurt us as time goes on.

I will not reveal my vote to the public. I hold my vote to my knowledge and will reveal it to others in due time, and I will reveal it to whoever asks. However, I will not put it out on display for the simple fact that you don’t always publicly announce who you voted for.

Congratulations once again America! You, the people who voted for the two heads, have done so much. There is no way to repay.

Have a good day America!

War-Torn Warrior

I attempt to write fiction prose, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t. This post may be the last post for a brief while simply because I have been swamped the past few days and I have been unable to write and the next few days will be incredibly hectic. Hope you enjoy!

I know I cannot accurately write about this topic because I have not experienced war. However, I would like to broaden my ability of writing and use what I have seen and heard to try to portray this everyday fact of life.

 

War-torn Warrior

 

The rifle pushes against my shoulder as it fires. Round after round leaves the barrel, shrieking, looking for its target. Screams ring out, blood flies. Bombs create chaotic explosions, limbs flying along with those explosions.

Everywhere I look, I see the living, the dead and the wounded. I’m walking past everyone and everything; I no longer care for my life.

My screams are the screams of my comrades, the screams of the dead, the screams of my enemies. My soul screams along with the screams of the things around me, the screams of humanity and nature. It screams at the sight of dead, mutilated children, women bullet-ridden, men with destroyed beyond repair. It is too much to bear.

As I cross another dead body, I feel something press to the side of my skull before it enters, the flash of pain warns me of what is to come. I know now, at this moment before I die, I can finally find peace by escaping this horror.

Dreams of the Beautiful Suicidal Souls

So this random idea popped into my head at midnight to write about bullying. Having gone through it myself, I know how low people can go and there are so many stories about how people will commit suicide due to this. So I also decided to start a book, entitled “Dreams of the Beautiful Suicidal Souls” but it may change, it is still in the working stages as I have barely thought of the concept. Here is the first entry that I envisioned.

 

Dreams of the Beautiful Suicidal Souls

 

December 25, 20XX

 

Dear Santa,

 

I know you don’t exist, but it brings comfort to me right now.

I don’t know what to do. This has been too much for me and I feel like nothing can be done. So many people know, so many have taunted and hurt me for what I have done. It was just an accident…

It was an accident. I shouldn’t have gone to that party. But I did. I went and drank. And drank. And drank. I drank so much that I blacked out. But I did recall small things like that I had sex with some guy, I lost my virginity to some guy from school. I was so drunk that I walked half naked around the party.

There were several videos and photos. One even shows me with that guy; he was a kid, maybe a freshman football player. I was called a rapist for that. I was called a slut and pedophile and abuser. I was told I should go kill myself. My locker would get marked with the word “SLUT” and “PEDOPHILE” on a regular basis. I had to leave school. My friends wouldn’t listen to me. Everyone believed the lies. People would throw money at me and ask how much I charged. They asked if I gave that boy a discount for being a minor.

Every day I was attacked. Girls would throw soiled pads and tampons, telling me that I was a filthy as those things. That I was gonna burn with the devil.

On my social media, I would be tagged in photos and videos. Photos of me passed out. Photos of me half – nude. Photos of me with several guys. Photos of me doing things to those guys. One video was of me having sex with that boy…the rest had me drunk and making a fool of myself. I knew I should not have gone. Videos of me pissing on the ground. Videos of me throwing up and crying for help. The laughing, it echoes in my ears.

I turned 17 just yesterday. I wanted to enjoy it I really did. But I also go a lot of videos and photos. Some I had seen, but I also saw some other ones. These idiots even made memes of these photos. I just want all of this to end.

I had such nice dreams. I wanted to have a nice family, with a handsome husband and many beautiful children. Blonde hair, many eye colors if possible. Daughters and sons.

I wanted to go to my dream school and study business. I wanted to work for a Fortune 500 company. I wish I could’ve seen my baby brother grow up. I wanted to see mom and dad live to a 50 year anniversary.

I had so many dreams I wanted to fulfil. But the torment was too much. Every day I shake and every day I cut myself. Today is the day when I leave this world. Maybe I will see a higher power…I will wait and see…

I love you Mommy and Daddy! I love you baby bro, always know that big sis loved you!

Take care of them Santa. I still don’t know why…but it made me comfortable.

I hope I can go quickly…

 

Love you,

Anna Johnson