Lost Trust

Fiction poem highlighting a common issue.

Lost Trust

 

I screamed and begged for

You to stop the pounding and pain

Yet you refused to listen

To my frightened voice.

 

You drugged me and it worked,

But not entirely and so I awoke

And felt the pounding and the pain

Deep in my gut.

 

When you finished, you collapsed

On top and still inside of my frail

And violated body. You broke my trust,

And lost trust is forever gone.

Paradise Lost

This story can possibly be difficult to read simply due to the content. However, this is a topic that needs to be addressed, something that cannot be swept underneath the rug. As you, the reader, will notice, I do not specify the gender of the victim because this can happen to not only women, but also men. This is a story I wrote a while back and I don’t like the fact that I wrote it for it sent me chills when I originally wrote this story.

Paradise Lost

 

Inner peace. That is what I need right now.

This is what I need as I feel my body being ripped apart, every muscle and fiber in my body screaming in utter agony. Tears streak down my face, I cry out for help; I feel my soul fade into the darkness that has enveloped me. I try to be strong, but my whole being feels weak.

Why is he doing this to me?

What did I do to deserve this?

I had thought we were friends; we were like soul siblings. Friends from elementary, we stayed together throughout our entire educational adventures. Even now in college, we are, or were, the closest of friends.

I feel the bedsheets underneath, sliding across my body as I’m being pushed back and forth. They’re silk. Andrew always had money.

We always played the same sports, played the same games, and even attended the same parties. We always took care of each other. Others always told us we were conjoined twins, attached at the hip; like a couple because of how inseparable we were back in our childhood years. If we fought, it was playful and never malicious. If we argued, we talked it out to get the problem resolved. No matter the argument or fight, we always had each other’s back.

My cries have become silent. The tears have wet the pillow that I buried my face in.

Who knew that on this night was the night that everything would change? Never did I believe that Andrew could have hurt me in the way that he did.

My body still screams. My tears have run dry; salt has replaced the tears and my eyes sting. My soul is losing its strength.

This party was the start of our college life. Everyone knew about the party since that was the only topic of conversation for nearly one week. Andrew and I both decided to go. It was going to be the first chapter in our newest book of our lives.

He keeps thrusting into me despite my whimpers and my desperate attempts to remove him off of me. Andrew has become someone I no longer know, someone I do not recognize.

We went to the party without incident. We danced and drank and played pool and laughed. Just like we had hundreds of times before. We decided to leave and walked over to his apartment, given how neither one of us could drive. Because of that, he said I could just stay the night, like countless times before at our childhood homes. Even though I had a slight buzz, I decided to stay given how drunk Andrew had gotten. To take care of him I said yes. We both got into bed together, just like we always had from our infancy.

I feel Andrew exiting my body. I’m relieved that it is over; my body breathes a sigh of relief.

I had been rudely awakened at the Devil’s hour. I thought he was just horsing around. He was always like this when he was drunk. That was when I felt him start to rape me.

3: 28. That was the time on the clock. It was next to my head on the nightstand.

Suddenly, the wind rushes out of my body. Andrew has started to rape me again. My body has become so weak from this; I feel my soul lose all hope.

I hear him moan from the pleasure he is getting from my pain. He screams a scream if pleasure and I suddenly feel a warmness inside of me. My body shakes from the shock. Andrew collapses on top of me and I feel his hot breath on my neck.

After a few moments he gets up off of me and tosses me aside. My whole body shakes, and I can’t move. He gets up and walks away into the bathroom, as if nothing had happened.

What happens now that our friendship is ruined? How do you rediscover a paradise that has been lost?